In the wake of Friday the 13th, Halloween and Munchies, there was a constant rush to make the next horror heavy(ies). We get a lot of weird films out of this 'Golden Age' such as Critters and the like. One of those films is an oft-forgotten one with a really quirky nature. It is...
The movie starts out with a random guy being killed by the titular character. That is the mandatory 'these are dangerous people' scene. It is followed up by the introduction of all of our 'teens that are really 22.' Don't get too connected to most of them though. They pull up to a park located right near the Golden Gate bridge...which I am sure exists. A group of ghoulies are sneaking up on them. We quickly learn that all of our monsters have their own 'unique' traits. This also is the only thing that defines them in any way.
-Biker-Indian
-Archer
-Electrocuter
-Cyclops monster
-Soldier
-Hangman
-Wolf-boy
-Axe
-Samurai
-Doc
-Knife-guy
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After witnessing the death of all of her friends and nearly escaping, our heroine decides to...lounge around her pool in a bikini. Unfortunately, no amount of tanning will make people believe her, since no evidence or bodies were around. All that was left was a weird neon-colored juice in some puddles. We get two other leads in this part: a dorky guy who loves our heroine and a teenager that appears to be 13. The two subplots give us hinted romance and investigation, respectively.
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The monsters really want to kill this girl though. At one point, they chase her through a subway car...which is empty for some reason. The Indian loses his arm in the fight, but it reappears later. The characters address this, but the film never answers it though. To make a long story short, the heroes learn that water kills the monsters...for some reason and prepare a trap for them. Naturally, the best trap is a concert full of potential victims armed with squirt guns. Did you read 'The Art of War' upside down or something?
*
Enough plot and killing- let's have some bad 80s music. Yeah, the movie mostly stops the narrative for three different songs. The most we get is a couple shots of people/Maniacs walking around the school. You want action? You wait until the movie is done, mister! Eventually, we do get some and it is pretty good. We get the soldier randomly running out of bullet and Doc doing his one scene. If you watch the trailer, you see about 80% of the deaths, so you may want to avoid it. The monsters flee and the police pursue them...only to find nothing. The heroes ride off...but one monster is still alive and kills the policemen. The End. Wait, no! If he killed the guy five minutes after they left, wouldn't they just come back in and look again? Nice try, movie!
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This movie is good in a cheesy sort of way. If you want good horror, you should know better than to rent Neon Maniacs. The pacing is not bad- even with the songs and the 'lounging in the bikini' bits- and the action is satisfying. The acting is...well, its on par with what you would expect. In spite of the amount of monsters they put in there, this movie just did not take off. Wait a couple months before someone buys up the rights though.
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How do I celebrate the 4th of July? With the founding fathers...and cannibalism. Stay tuned...
Im one of the few people that loved this one, cant wait to rewatch it! I was surprised at how sweet the costuming was, it was just unfortunate that it wasnt able to build into something a little more epic. Its like a sad little unloved Nightbreed that just needed more money, better actors, and a better director to kick into second gear lol..
ReplyDeleteThe movie had far too many problems so the director, who had to not only direct, but take over the film when the original cinematographer did not return after the film went on hiatus when monetary problems arose. For what it is, it's a flawed film with immense potential. Somehow it managed to play the local theater in my town back in '86. There was around 6 people there including myself. The only reason I knew of the film was reading about it in Fangoria and I never saw it advertised on tv.
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